Reminiscence

Do you want to remember,
or do you prefer to forget?
Exist, or vanish?
Preserve, demolish?

If remembering tears you apart
If the supposed-to-be existence is a shadow that you can't touch
If the memories are such the warm breeze that you can't embrace
If looking back breaks your heart,
Do you want to forget?

In the pieces of you, his substances exist
The shadow falls from the reflection of your inner light
In the warm breeze you inhale his scent
Looking back, you see yourself smiled
Would you still try to forget?

If remembering can bring me back then to the innocence
When love is nothing but the warmth that washes my soul
The cloud beds that craddle my sweetest dreams
The possibilities, the joy, the hopes, the sparks
I wouldn't want to forget

If remembering can bring me back the hopes
That I could see again my future with a person
building a life that is not just about me
sharing the love that is not only about posession and jealousy
holding a hand that I would hold until it's old and wrinkled
caring and loving unconditionally
then I don't want to forget

Funny to realize that hopes lied in the past,
What I used to believe is what I want to believe,
In this empty present I seek for fulfillness from the no-longer-exist-fulfilled past
Then would I,
In my reminescence,
Move forward?

*for those who's still anchoring their future at the past...
AW - Albany, August 27, 2009

*Rem•i•nis•cence
Pronunciation: \re-ˈni-sən(t)s\
(From Merriam-Webster Dictionary)
Function: noun
Date: 1589
1 : apprehension of a Platonic idea as if it had been known in a previous existence
2 a : recall to mind of a long-forgotten experience or fact b : the process or practice of thinking or telling about past experiences
3 a : a remembered experience b : an account of a memorable experience —often used in plural
4 : something so like another as to be regarded as an unconscious repetition, imitation, or survival